Sunday, July 18, 2010

You can choose your friends but you can't choose your relatives

A visit to a very close friend in a hospice this week made me think of dear friends and reflect on the importance of them in our family's life.

An only child, I have not had the benefit of those special relationships that come from siblings. As a result I have formed very close relationships with a small number of friends who, for me, take the place of brothers and sisters. We have shared family holidays, called on each others in times of need, enjoyed Christmases together and shared family celebrations.

A check of my genealogy program, TMG, indicates that one can add Godchildren and Godparents to the family tree. We have a number of "God" relationships with our dearest friends families so I have made a decision to add our Godchildren and our children's Godparents to our tree. Similarly I am going to add members of my family's bridal parties as witnesses so that they too will appear in our database.

In the case of toasts and  speeches at family events I am going to add the events eg Christenings, 21sts, Engagement Parties and add those friends who had these roles as witnesses to the events.

I have been tagging all our family photos so my descendants should be able to work out who our friends were from the number of tagged photos I have of them. I would still, however, like to make some mention of them in our tree and am wondering how other genealogists record information for future generations on those they have chosen to be their friends.

In my final goodbye to my dear friend at the hospice we told each other of our love for one another,  recognised the great times we had had together, that we had been friends through thick and thin and that we were always there for each other.

I want my descendants to know what an important part she played in our family's life.

1 comment:

GrannyPam said...

I am sorry to hear about your friends illness, but I am glad you had some more time together.

A good idea to keep her close to your family by recording information about your relationship.


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