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Monday, January 23, 2023

My Cousin Tim

I got to know my cousin, Tim,  yesterday.

Jill and her first cousin Tim

Back in 2014 I wrote a post about my Aunty Mary in which I mentioned a child she had borne and given up. I knew nothing of Tim's existence until Mary's funeral in 1997 when the Minister acknowledged Mary's son in the congregation. What a bombshell! 

It was such a shock that I neglected to get Tim's contact details.

As an only child with close relatives thin on the ground I have been wanting to find Tim and welcome him into the family fold for the past 25 years.

Since 1997 I have been hoping that one day Tim would seek out members of his biological family. On Friday evening Tim, who is now in his fifties, and his wife were googling Mary's name and came across Mary's name with two Living children mentioned in my online tree. 

When I was checking my email on Saturday morning I got this message:

 "Proposed Change: Duncan Mary Olive (I99)

Tree: GeniAus Family Tree
Link: http://www.geniaus.net/getperson.php?personID=I99&tree=geniaus001

Description: I am number 2, living Male"

Tim had found me!

During the course of the day we exchanged emails and then had a very emotional 'phone call when we arranged to meet up the following day for lunch at our home.

Meeting Tim, his beautiful wife and two of their children was an awesome but emotionally draining experience. I learnt about Tim's childhood that was no bed of roses, I was so sad that he didn't have the opportunity to meet our dear grandmother Ethel and the extended family. 

It was little compensation but I was pleased I could send Tim away with a cache of photos of his mother and her family, some stories and contact details for another cousin. I am so pleased that I have recorded many of these stories on this blog and that Tim and his children will be able to absorb them at their leisure. I can't make up for all those missing years but I will do my darndest to use my skills to help Tim and his family learn about their heritage.

I thank Tim and family for spending time and so graciously accepting us yesterday and Tim for his willingness to do a DNA test. I look forward to our further meetings.

 I know that Aunty Mary would be so proud of the man Tim has become today. 

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